Over Time -- Mistakes Were Few but I Believe They're Mine

Halle-fucking-lujah!

I "passed" my kidney stone. "Passed" can mean a lot of different things. In this case, it meant a series of agonizing urinations, culminating in a painful finale.

By that same token, "Stone" also has many meanings. In this case, it is more like an arrowhead.
Or a thorny, sharpened Conch shell, with little razors all over it, carrying scissors.

Now, we are going to go backstage, and interview "The Stone":




Q: So, that was some tour, huh?
A: Yeah. Whew. I thought I had gotten lost in there, man. I was just hangin' out, getting ready to
attach myself to something, forever, ya know?

Q: It felt like you were burning something in there. What was that?
A: Oh, sorry, Bro, It was pretty dark, and I had to light my Zippo a few times, so I could see.

Q: What did you need to see?
A: Well, I carved my name a few times, and wanted to make sure it looked OK.


Q: So that is where the blood came from.
A: Yep. Well, mostly. I had a few stapling projects to do in there.

Q: Ok, well, that hurt.
A: ... (lights cigar)

Q: No, I mean it REALLY hurt.
A: You know, you are starting to sound like a little bitch (making crying noises) Wah wah wah..it hurt..it hurt. Get over it, already.

Q: I am beginning to see why you have such a bad reputation.
A: Hey, that's just how I roll, son.

Q: Can we expect any future tours?
A: Well, not from me. I am out of the business. But I do have a few brothers, and some cousins who might step up, at some point.

Q: Why do you do it? I mean, what is the purpose?
A: Haters gotta hate, lovers gotta love, you know what I'm sayin'?

Q: No.
A: Whatever. Fuck you, man.

Q: You are quite hostile
A: Aw, man, this interview is over. No more questions.


And, with that, he ran across the street, turned around and gave me the finger, and then was gone.

It's My Voice--My Voice Cries Out Obscenity

Good news from the urinary tract!!

My pee looks like pee again!

I am aware that this probably isn't "blog-worthy" for most (normal) people.
But, after a day of pissing blood, this is not only blog-worthy, but it is cause for celebration.

I should point out that all 3 of the meds that I was prescribed cause dizziness, or drowsiness,
so I am not really "of sound mind".

In fact, I am feeling pretty out of it.

What was I just talking about?

Like a Workhorse Stands for Miles--Work for You and Never Get Tired

I woke up this AM with a pain in my side, it felt like a cramp.
After I had been awake for about 20 minutes, it was hurting more, and more.
Then, the pain sort of spiked, and I puked (it was awesome---just like at the ' Maiden show, bro!)

And THEN, I peed...and it looked like red wine, which would be OK, if I was our Lord and Savior, which I am not (or AM I?)

So, yeah, bloody pee, pain in my side, I must be dying.
We went to the hospital (it was FUN) and we were the only people in the Emergency Room (the "ER")
in spite of all the cars in the "PL" .

I hadn't even finished filling in the paperwork, and they were calling me into the Triage Unit. (the TU)

I had blood drawn, and then was given a shot of some painkiller, and an anti-nausea agent.
They did a CT Scan, and was told I have a kidney stone (jealous?)
Anyhow, I am about to go fetch my prescriptions, (vicodin, reglan {anti-nausea drug}, and fucking Flomax!!--the prostate shrinker upper--it supposedly helps with stones)

All in all, I would give the day 2 middle fingers, way up!!

Actually though, for a hospital, it was not bad. I was in and out in less than 2 hours,
and didn't see anyone else's bodily fluids.

So, I am about to experience the miracle of childbirth, sort of.

This is totally going to suck.

No Longer Capable of Enslaving the Likes of Humankind

So, I didn't get the tooth pulled after all.

The oral surgeon said that if I have more teeth that need to be pulled, it makes better sense to do them all at once, rather than pay for the anesthesia twice.

Which does make perfect sense to me, too...but...

That means I have to go BACK to the first dentist...and THEN make another appointment with the oral surgeon.

This was after I had wussed out from letting him yank it with just novocaine.
I told him it is not so much the pain, as that tooth has hurt forever..it is the "being aware of what he is doing" factor.

Then I asked him "What would you do if you were me--bearing in mind that i have NO insurance, and a very limited supply o' cash"

That was CLEARLY a situation he was NOT comfy in...I could see it on his face...him, thinking "Me? Poor? um--No. "

But, he then came up with the plan of going back to the first dentist, and seeing what else needs to come out, and then doing it all at once.
Which did also let me save face a little...I almost felt like If I left , and wasn't bleeding, that the Aryan Vanguard of receptionists (they are SERIOUSLY all blond haired, 5'10", severe faced women in their 50's, and there were about 7 of them) would be let down.

So, now I get to look like a dick to the first dentist, because I originally saw him over a month ago, and he told me to get the tooth pulled, AND THEN come back.

The funny thing is...the tooth feels fine now, no pain. It is like it is making it's toothy case to stay.

It is telling me " C'mon man...lemmy stay here...I'll protect this portion of your gums, don't let him take me out man...please man, I won't hurt you no more"

If it was a bicuspid, I might listen..but you can NEVER trust a molar.