Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Outcast With Dogmas Forged Below--Seared and Beaten Banished from Where I was Born

So,

I had a birthday a few days ago. It was nice.

38.

I am now officially too old to be signed to a long-term sports contract.

I would maybe get a 3 year deal, max.

I could really rant here about our new goddamn medical insurance billing issues,
but I don't want to open that can of horrid beans again.

Yes, I do.

We signed up with a new insurance plan, on June 28th. We paid them (well, they took their money) on July 7th. Then, they took more money on July 30th.
And then they took more money today.

So, I call them, to find out WTF... Why have I paid $935.83 for something that is supposed to cost $311 a month, and I only signed up a month and a half ago...

and get it all broken down for me, as I am an imbecile, evidently.

The money that they took today, covers us until September 19. (OK)
The money that they took on the 30th of July was to cover July 18 until August 18 (OK, yes,)
The money that they took on July 7th, covered us between June 18, and July 18 (No---wait)

I said "Why do I have to pay for that time, I wasn't a member yet--I don't think that is right"

So, then, the tables turned, as I tried to 'splain to her that I signed up on the 28th of June, and surely shouldn't have to pay for the period before I was insured...and how can they charge people for retroactive health-care??

I could FEEL her blank stare through the phone.


In fact, I wrote a haiku about it:

Stupid fucking bitch
Hoping I will stop yelling
Not saying a word

Or this one:

I felt cheated and
Continue to feel cheated
By Assurant Health




I was SO inspired, that I even wrote a limerick:


There once was a man from Nantucket
My fucking medical insurance company sucks
I yelled on the phone, and didn't feel better
I am not good at writing limericks.


Yes, I know that wasn't very good, but, limericks aren't really very good to begin with.








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