She--Laughing and Weeping at Once--Said " Take Me Away"

Well, I Crowed a pretty mean Kay, but I still lost 2 outta 3...or was it 3 outta 3?

I don't want to say my Mom cheated in croquet, but she did.

She made me use the crappy yellow ball...and I think my mallet was cracked.
And I wasn't wearing croquet shoes...and the sun was in my eyes a little.
My shirt was too tight in the shoulders, and my shorts were too loose. I had JUST washed my hair, so it was unruly, and in my way. I was too worried about the reducing the carbon footprint we had created setting up the wire thingies.

I was a feeling sick...um...I can't think of any other excus---er reasons right now...

Oh yeah...she had the home field advantage. I had driven all that way, and was very tired.

I am thinking about asking for a performance enhancing drug test.

We are going in today for Easter dinner...and maybe a rematch.

Only thing standing between me and a sure victory... I have a mosquito bite on my knee...